“It’s tempting to blame our parents or children for our chaos. However, blaming others moves us in the wrong direction. Becoming accountable for everything is the essence of true transformation.” -Yehuda Berg
Are you making someone else your scapegoat? Are your parents, spouse, friends, or children to blame for how life turned out for you? In this day and age, people are willingly giving their power away at an alarming rate, and as a result more are becoming a victim of circumstance. Come on folks; stop looking for ways to let yourself off the hook. How in the world are you going to make someone else responsible for your life!
Recently, there was a 32-year-old NYC homeless man that was suing his parents for $200,000, claiming that they didn’t love him enough. This man is a complete hot mess, and has no legitimate grounds to file such proceedings. I cannot believe that he is actually blaming his parents for his current predicament of being homeless. Despite what he may believe about the past, it was in his power as an adult to make his own decisions and conduct his own affairs. As a 32-year-old man he has made his bed, so he must lie in it! He’s an adult now, so there is no reason to blame his parents at this point. It’s a pity to hear people just give their power away as in the case of this young man, but this situation is a perfect example of playing the blame game.
People always feel more comfortable when someone else takes the blame for bad situations that occur in their life. Often times the blamer is usually in a weak position, and tries to gain some power, by blaming another. Sometimes the simple act of blaming others can be a cry for help, because this person desperately wants someone else to fix their problems. However, if you’re waiting for others to fix your dilemma, you’ll be in for a rude awakening. When you blame others, things are outside of your power, but when you hold yourself accountable windows of opportunity open up for you to resolve your troubles. Therefore, in order to live an empowered life, as I’ve been encouraging you to do; you’ll have to take personal responsibility for all decisions and actions.
“All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much you find fault with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you.” –Wayne Dyer
How do you stop blaming others?
- Face your mistakes head on, by admitting it was your fault.
- Affirm to yourself everyday that, “I am responsible for my circumstance.”
- Put a stop to all whining and complaining.
- Learn to accept and cope with anything that life my throws at you.
- Become a solution-oriented person.
- Forgive, and let go of the past.
- Become in control of your life by identifying the things that are not going right, and taking some action to change it.
- Develop your inner strength and willpower, so that you are strong and can face any challenge that might show up at your doorstep.
- Put your pride aside, and be open to new ideas and opinions from others.
- When you begin to blame, ask yourself “Am I giving my power away?”
- Think one step ahead of the game, by being organized and staying on top of all your affairs.
- Reach out and ask for help when you need it.
Taking personal responsibility not only will empower you, but also boost your self-esteem. So, quit sitting in the passenger seat of life pointing fingers, and be the gatekeeper of your domain, and own your stuff!
Who are you blaming in your life? Why? Share your thoughts by leaving a comment below.
Shawna Kay ( Blissed Out Belle )
Kay is a Lifestyle & Empowerment Enthusiast, and the Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Blissed Out Belle™. Connect with her on Facebook here, and follow her on Twitter @BlissedOutBelle .